Research on 'Relationships'

Hi peeps,

I am doing this research on "Relationships" which include, singlehood, dating, courtship, marriage, finding love partner.. etc and do a presentation on it. What I'm asking from you are questions that you have about the topic. It can be anything, as long as its relevant to the topic mentioned. With the questions that we gather from ourselves (teammates and I) and anyone who comments about it, we will try our best to relate it with what the Bible have to say, (which we believe it is the Word of God) concerning the questions that we have about relationships. So, what we do is to tie in and relate the answers to your questions with what God has to say about it, not out of our own opinions.

So, please feel free to just throw in some questions about relationship issues. Whether you are from different race, nationality, religion, anything la... It'll be good to hear from you. Those who has my MSN, you can message me, those who doesn't have can just put your questions under this post's comments.

Thanks.


Lizzie

Life Partner (Part II)

Continuation of the post before...

• Leadership: My future partner shouldn't make hasty decisions. It'll be good if he can consult me about it and both of us share our view points about the decision. But overall, the leadership will fall upon him. I wouldn't really like it, if my husband depend on me to make every decisions in the house. Also, I want God to be involved in the decisions we make.I pray that God's wisdom will be upon him and he will not take this responsibility lightly. I will learn submit to the authority of my husband and even if his decisions isn't wise, I shall submit it to God and not put him down him for not taking my advice when the decision goes wrong. We'll work and walk it through together. I believe the power of authority in the family is very important for the whole family's well being and spiritual life. What you teach and model to your children, is very important, however, it is a hard task.

• Integrity: In what he believes in, his values and in his workplace. This integrity is grounded in the word of God - The understanding of what you believe and values, also, obedience to God's word and His calling though you may not understand it yet. It is the principle behind it. Walk the talk. I believe it comes with a teachable heart and humble spirit within. This came into mind,"You are in the world but you are not of the world". Meaning, you don't have to be like everyone else or just follow the flow, though you are part of them (human race), but stick firm to what you believe in and the values you trust is right and favourable in God's eyes. It is a daily learning process as we face trials and temptations in different stages of our lives.
  
• Joy: Joy of living. The joy of Christ, contend with where he is, who he is and what he is and yet, continue to maximize his potential and put every effort and everything he do, every breath he breathes, every step he takes, to bring glory to our Almighty God. A guy that is vibrant in the way he lives. I love a guy with a great smile and spreads joy with the people around him. A guy who knows what or who he is living for and has the joy to live out loud for Him. A person who guides me in that direction to be a blessing to others as well, through the joy of the Lord in us.
  
• Spreads the love: A person that doesn't just focus his attention to me only, but are sensitive to other people's needs as well. What I meant to say is that... he is in this ministry of touching lives, being sensitive to people's needs, not only mine or his own. This way, we are able to spread the love of God together. A person that doesn't live on his own or for his own. A guy that also, knows his boundaries when he is meeting the needs of others . I do not mean it as a church ministry, but a life long commitment to serve God by giving his life to serve people, just as Christ did and that is what Christ wants from us as well. We do it not because others deserved it, but God loved us first and Christ still loves us. As Christians, He lives in us (or at least should be), therefore, we should be portraying His love to others and be a blessing to them. The ministry of "Touching Hearts, Changing Lives", not by our own works, but God with us.
  
• Spirit of excellence. I'm not talking about being the best among others. I believe that the standard is not of human's standard but God's standard. He sets the standard on how we should live, He IS the standard. Collosians 3:23 "And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men". I believe in whatever you do, always keep in mind that you are not doing it just on your own or for others, but God as well - whether it's the simple things you do, in studies, a project, in your workplace, serving in church etc. Everything we do, every labor we toil is an offering to God. So, let it be an offering that brings fragrance and brings favor to Him. We should give Him the best because He deserves the best. It is not about competitions or selfish desires to be on top or the best. Rather, reaching to be Christlike because He wants us to be. Therefore, we should be careful with the way we live our lives. This also comes with surrender because you are surrendering your life and whatever you do to someone greater than you can ever imagine or you can ever be.
  

Guess I over shot. I never knew that I can write so much about my ideal life partner. If you ask me in person, I probably can't tell you in detail or much at the spot itself. But when I type it down, I really reflect upon what I want to say and express. I believe the list doesn't just stop there... I pray that whoever I am with, whether he is as ideal as the list or not, I'll be able to accept and love him in whatever state he is in and for who he is, and yearn to help each other grow physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically and spiritually.

Future life partner...

I was just reminded of a post that I was suppose to put up weeks ago... perhaps even a month ago >_< *sorry gal* My friend tagged me on the 8 traits/points on an ideal lover for me. Lover sounds quite cliche for me, that's why I prefer to call it my future life partner. The word life partner bring much meaning to me. Anywayz, here goes...

• Loves God: A person who loves God would honor Him and live in righteousness according to His ways. I know that he may not be perfect, but I know that because of this love with God, He would attempt to reach to God's standards of living. It is when we submit and trust God in different areas in our lives, we will begin to grow more into His likeness and he shall grow in substance, shown through his character. I can be assured that, he would be a living testimony for me, our kids and the people around us.

• Family Man: I would like my future life partner to still spend time with me and our kids, in the midst of his busy working life. I don't mean, abandoning work at all... but having a balance between those two. Responsibility over his work and also, his own family. I would want him to set aside time for me and the kids for family bonding, mentoring them about God and life as well as walking together, hand-in-hand in life as a family, thru thick & thin. A husband and a father who sets example for the family and loves us with an open heart and open arms *hugz*

• Captures my heart: Heheh of course before marrying me, the person would have to capture my heart first. But, I don't want it to just end there. It'll be great if he could capture my heart and still be passionate after we're married. Not just the first few years (that would be the easier part), but later years as well (which gets harder), until we grow old (even harder) and move on to Heaven (the, we rejoice together!). I know that passionate feelings do come and go, and as you live & know the person long enough you may get tired of him/her and when you realize and see all the silly and bad habits (that used to be cute but increadibly irritating after that), it is really hard to want or believe that you're married to this person. I really pray that my future husband would make attempts to sustain our marriage life, and I would do so too. You see I'm the kind of girl who needs to be reaffirmed of my love for the person and the person for me. I love it when the guy sweep me off my feet, do silly sweet stuff for me and it really captures my heart when I see the person putting the effort or initiate to do something for me. I feel deeply touched. The guy don't have to shower me with gifts (although it would be nice to recieve once in a while).. simple things do makes me happy; like words of affirmation, remembering special dates, keep aside time for me, a comforting hug and I guess, the guy would have to find what my love language is ler... then it'll be easier for him kua.

• Purity: A partner that keeps me pure, before and after marriage. A guy that knows his limits when we are courting/dating. A guy who initiates the right moves (eg. holding hands) at the right time but not pushing it any further than it should. A guy that respects me as a gal or a women. Not just physical touch, but keeping my heart guarded for God & my future husband (it should be him-la, but what if something happens betw the both of us?). Also, keeping my mind pure.. as in, the things we talk about, shouldn't provoke any unclean thoughts. Last but not least, spiritually building me up as a fine women, wife and mother... women of worth and one that seeks God.

I'm only at number 4. Still thinking of the rest of the 4 more...
Keep in touch for the continuation =)

Can't sleep

It's 3.40am in the morning and I can't sleep. I don't even really feel sleepy or tired.
I've tried sleeping just now but I have so many things in my mind. I was talking to God about what is going on in my life and what has been going on in my friend's lives. Of course, He knows it already, but I feel there is a need to tell Him still. That's how I communicate with Him. After that, it slowly wondered to different things, which I can't remember. I guess, it was going into the unconcious. Random thoughts.

Anywayz, the great thing is, I have to be awake by 8.30am, the latest for leader's meeting and church celebration after that. I have no idea how am I gonna survive that.

Oh.. it's 4.05am already. Ok, now my eyes are feeling a bit heavy.
"Lord, please help me feel sleepy and fall into a deep sleep until 8.30am"

These days, I felt as if there is an angel watching over me and Jesus holding my hand, through the things that have been bothering me. Just a few days ago, I begged and cried for Him, not to leave me and to hold my hand. I don't know who can I hang on to anymore apart from Him. I prayed asking Him to help me not leave Him to 'cuz I know I often run away from His presence, wondering around on my own and getting lost.

When I was thinking while trying to sleep just now, I imagined something wonderful...

"Jesus asking me to dance with Him.. I was a small girl at that time... then, suddenly I've grown older, with this really beautiful dress. I can't remember it's color, was it pink or white. Anyway, I was dancing around my Lord Jesus Christ. I felt like a princess too, I told Him. The thing is, she doesn't look like me, she looks so much prettier, thinner, elegant, poise and all. I wished I had her looks, the way she conducted herself and all. I've imagined myself to be her. But Jesus told me "You don't have to be someone else. You are beautiful just the way you are" - somewhat along that line.

You see, I've always wanted to be prettier, smarter, better, nicer, friendlier and all that, than the state that I am now. I do feel inferior to others because I compare myself to them. But, God is trying to remind me that, I don't have to try so hard. He will allow me to blossom in my own time. I am already beautiful from the time He made me and will indeed mature into a more beautiful girl and it may not be because of my looks or because I was smarter and all that. It is my heart... the heart that is willing to dance with the Lord and follow His rhythm. I am His little princess, if I allow Him, the King to be my Father. Allowing myself to freely dance before Him, expressing my love to Him and flow with Him, ya know. He loves that. He loves to see me dance. He loves it when I dance with Him. I see the smile in Jesus' face.

That reminded me of the song I composed a few years back, entitled...

"Smile on Your face"

You look to me,
With that smile on Your face,
You would draw close each day,
And gently touch my face.

As I reach to You,
You would carry me,
Like a Father,
In Your loving arms

Whispering in my ears,
Saying "I love you my, child"

For everytime, I pray,
I want to see that smile,
As You look upon me.
Each night before I sleep,
I'll always dream that You,
Would twirl me around as we dance,
And I'll see that smile,
That smile on Your face.

Composed & Copyright by Elizabeth Hie.

Worried...

• About my own spiritual life and my brother's.
• My friend's health because she hasn't been taking care of it.
• My friends' romance life (relationships) because it hurts me as well to see them hurt if it fails to work out.
• People around me losing hope.
  
• I'll lose touch with the wonderful peeps I've just met in camp.
• Safety of my neighbourhood, home, family and friends.
• Future career paths.
• Adaptabality to Australian lifestyle & environment
• Subjects for my 3rd year in UniSA.
• Whether UniSA is the right choice!
• Cell member's spiritual growth & the people close to me.
• Friendships with others.
  
• I would not dare to commit into a relationship, therefore, I won't be able to start one.
• I'll be a person, whom I do not want to be!
  
• Addicted to drinking when I go Aussie.
• Allowing my wild side to take control of me.
• Take BGR relationships lightly - treating it as a fling.
• Something stoping God from working in my life.
• I wouldn't get to spend much time with my mum before I leave Aus.

The list just goes on....

"Lord, help me to surrender all these into your hands. Indeed, please grant me peace, as you've granted your disciples when you met them again after your death. These were the words you said to them "Peace be with you". Indeed, I pray for your Holy Spirit to guide me each day in wisdom in the decisions I make and also, I pray that You will guard my heart from the evil one and from falling into temptations. Help me to cast my worries to You, O God. I may not be in control, but You are. Help us to remember that. Praise You O God, for You are still good beyond all the circumstances. You are above all these things. In Jesus Name, Amen"

Want to make a change

Want to make a change in:-

Blog: Anyone know's how to do blog design?

I want my blog to have a soft, light background of the 4 seasons-Summer, Autmum, Winter & Spring. It symbolizes something for me and I have a meaningful song to fit with it as well.

Outlook appearance:

• Hair: For easier maintanence. I've longed to highlight my hair blue or blue-ish red (purple)!
• Clothes: My bestfriend always say that I have bad fashion sense. One day, you bring me shopping and dress me up ler, gal!
• Size/Fitness: Wish I can be taller and thinner. *haha* since I don't think it'll happen (my bro stole the height genes from me!!!) I just wanna keep fit, look just right and be healthy!
• Looks: I'm don't usually put make up when I go out (Only when I dance). I just want to have a fresher and a more confident look with a wide smile to cheer people up. A smile can make a difference in people's lives.

Character:

• Friendliness - I don't know why, I find certain people intimidating. Perhaps, I should draw near to them and get to know them, instead of withdrawing myself from them. So far, those people whom I thought was intimidating, turned out to be a nice bunch of peeps. By doing this, I would probably build up my self-esteem and shyness. Of course, I shall be careful also-ler, not to get into wrong hands.
• Firm-ness - I gotta learn to rebuke in a right manner and also speak my mind out when I disagree, have an opinion or when I know that something should be done but isn't done.
• Leadership - Learn to dare to lead. I've always underestimated myself or take lightly the position I held. So, I've learnt not to play-play with the role and also not underestimating God and what He can do in my life. Of course, I'll always be reminded that leadership starts off my serving. Actually, leadership is servanthood as well, cause we are serving the people and their needs.
• Humbleness - I admit that I do have this ego-centric part of me. Sometimes I can be quite prideful and insensitive to others. I'm so sorry for those whom I've hurt because of my pride. I am the kind of person who tend to compare myself with others. So, I guess, I need to be humble. Afterall, I shouldn't compare myself with human standards, but with God standards.. because, human standards change, but God's standards doesn't change even over time. He sets the standard, He IS the standard.

What else? I guess it's all for now. The thing is whenever I change, people do look at me differntly and somehow they want the old Lizzie back. I just hope that I won't go over-fanatic about changing that I lose the true purpose of why am I doing this in the first place. I hope that I can be a better Lizzie instead of the unrecognized Lizzie (in a negative way).

Taken Away

It seems that the things I loved once, but I didn't appreciate much in the later years, were taken away from me.

1st: My dog, Rufus. I use to have time for him. I put him to sleep at night, as I let him sleep on my lap and pat him to bed. I used to play with him and feed him. Years went by and I as I grew and so my dog, I didn't have much time to even touch or look at my dog. I was often out of the house or lazing in the house. I hardly walk around my backyard, you see. I only see him when I wash my hands in the kitchen, his cage would be right in front. I see him when I come back.. he would greet me at the side of the garden, looking intently at me, but I walked into the house. He stares at me when I play music on my piano, and I just smile back at him. At times, I would pat him, but many times I didn't want to get myself dirty before I went out or when I am in the house bumming around.

2nd: My piano that has been with me since I was 4-5 years old. Now, I found out that they are gonna move the piano out! Well, I haven't been really using that piano since after my SPM. My parents got me this digital piano as a gift for my SPM results. I wasn't the best, but I did my best and my parents was proud of me. I wanted a keyboard, so that I could bring it to Aussie when I further my studies, but my dad wasn't too happy with the sound produced by it.. So, suddenly upgraded to digital piano *hahaha* Yeah.. anyway.. when I started thinking about the piano being sold, I feel a little sad. I mean, it has been with me for more than 10years. It's like part of the family. I loved it, I hated it (the lessons and exams, mainly). I composed songs with it.. I had sweet and bitter memories with it.

3rd: My close friend/(s). Okay, maybe the person is not like taken away.. away kinda thing. I should be thankful and grateful that the person/they are still there. Just feel a lil left out and "you're so near yet so far" kinda thing. It's just kinda sad, just left with the memories I had with the person or them. Worst, I don't know how to make it work as close friends again after that. I've became handicapped, most of the time, lost for words. However, I am still thankful that those people are still around and just... friends.

Sigh... I know that I didn't appreciate the things that God has handed me to take care of or to steward of. It makes me wonder, how am I gonna do BIG things for Him, if I can't even handle the little things for Him? I really do regret but I guess there is a lesson that we all will learn after that... especially when the things precious to us, are taken away from us.