Different personalities?

My family view me as...
- most irresponsible person
- most worried by them
- spends the most money
- lazy
- indiscipline
- not commited/sensitive enough to home affairs
- always late/last minute
- never learns from one's mistake
- unrealible
- very dependent on them & others


What people view me as...
- Coorperative
- to some people, always on time (transportation)
- committed in work
- hardworking (when they happen to see me do work)
- reliable
- servanthood heart (oh boy... that's where I try to take up every responsiblity I can. Why?)


What I view myself...
- I do not like to spend too much

• but i don't know why my hp bill is increadibly freaking high every month
• Not much of a shopper (only go shopping like 3 times a year or smtng...)
• Probably spend a lot of food
  

- ok.. I am tardy..

• 'cuz there is no reason for me to be early for class
• why? cuz i do not learn anything from there! (wish I can tell my parents that...)
• dread going for class & have to wake up early for useless class

- last minute-ness..

• I thought it was considered better than last time edi

- I can be independant. I really can!

• Went lunch on my own several times before
• At times, I walk ahead of others on my own (does that count?)
• Because I was percieved as dependant, I like to be on my own in college (underlying issue on why I am less sociable there)
• Is that why I try to pick up leadership role in coll (at times) & always eager to serve in ministries? Oh gosh... (something I have to question myself)
  

- I am somewhat irresponsible/unrealible because I forget at times!!!

• That's why, I always ask my friends to remind me, if I need to do something important for them.
• Also, I am considered someone willing to do everything and serve... why? I think I just realized the answer
• I didn't like to be irresponsible, therefore, I try to take up every responsibilities I can in other places (underlying cause... unconcious manifest into conciousness)
  
• By taking up many responsibilities outside, i became less involved at home and even less responsible
  

- I do not need people to be worried about me.

• I am 19 and a half years old, for goodness sake.

- It's not that I don't want to learn from mistakes.

• Think, I don't think about it almost everyday????!!!
• Want me to have another car accident to make me realize & change ah?
• I guess, I just don't think of it enough and put it as a priority to fix all these probs in the first place *sigh*

Note to Liz: CLEAN UP THE MESS IN YOUR LIFE!!!!

Liz: okay... not like I have much of a choice...